The only one I don’t agree with is the “What I think I do.” I know I don’t do that, I am all about the research.
The 10 Most Ridiculous Lawsuits of 2011 ⇢
- Convict sues couple he kidnapped for not helping him evade police
- Man illegally brings gun into bar, gets injured in a fight, then sues bar for not searching him for a weapon
- Young adults sue mother for sending cards without gifts and playing favorites
- Woman disagrees with store over 80-cent refund, sues for $5 million
- Mom files suit against exclusive preschool over child’s college prospects
- Man suing for age discrimination says judge in his case is too old
- Obese man sues burger joint over tight squeeze in booths (not sure about this one)
- Woman sues over movie trailer; says not enough driving in “Drive”
- Passenger’s lawsuit says cruise ship went too fast and swayed from side to side
- Mother sues Chuck E. Cheese – says games encourage gambling in children
Links to the full news stories from which these were drawn and the complete results of the poll can be found on the Faces of Lawsuit Abuse web site.
I bolded my favorites.
The 10 Most Ridiculous Lawsuits of 2011 ⇢
- Convict sues couple he kidnapped for not helping him evade police
- Man illegally brings gun into bar, gets injured in a fight, then sues bar for not searching him for a weapon
- Young adults sue mother for sending cards without gifts and playing favorites
- Woman disagrees with store over 80-cent refund, sues for $5 million
- Mom files suit against exclusive preschool over child’s college prospects
- Man suing for age discrimination says judge in his case is too old
- Obese man sues burger joint over tight squeeze in booths (not sure about this one)
- Woman sues over movie trailer; says not enough driving in “Drive”
- Passenger’s lawsuit says cruise ship went too fast and swayed from side to side
- Mother sues Chuck E. Cheese – says games encourage gambling in children
Links to the full news stories from which these were drawn and the complete results of the poll can be found on the Faces of Lawsuit Abuse web site.
I bolded my favorites.
Quantumaniac: Why did the chicken cross the road? ⇢
Why did the chicken cross the road?
___
Albert Einstein: The chicken did not cross the road. The road passed beneath the chicken.
Isaac Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend to cross roads.
Wolfgang Pauli: There was already a chicken on this…
The 25 Funniest Analogies (Collected by High School English Teachers) ⇢
The e-mail says they are taken from actual high school essays and collected by English teachers across the country for their own amusement.
Here are some of my favorites:
3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.
8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife’s infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.
11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph. 15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan’s teeth. 16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met. 21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while. 22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something. 25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
Some of these are hilarious. Check out the rest of them for a good laugh. They had me crying by the end.